Tuesday, May 3, 2011

The Staffroom Grapevine - Part 2

there is always someone in our lives whom everybody can live without. an aunt, a classmate, a neighbor, a celebrity figure.
for me, that person is *drumroll*


The Bully.

she terrorizes the staffroom like no other. she prowls around the corridors and preys on unsuspecting innocent creatures (like ME) and does what she does best:

BULLIES.

now, you must be thinking, "a teacher being a bully? what is that all about?"
(okay, maybe you're not thinking that. but whatever. you should, so that the following sentence is of use to you:)

YES. The Bully is the only teacher in the school whom i would gladly like to see resign and perhaps join the navy and be shipped off to Antarctica to live with penguins.

The Bully is tall, fair, blonde(ish) and 50-something years old. when she enters the Staffroom, all the teachers that happen to be present there avert her gaze, hoping and praying that she doesn't strike up a conversation with them. because unlike normal chit-chat and banter, this is what The Bully talks about:

"my daughter and her husband are having a grand time vacationing in Italy! where have YOUR children been for their holidays?"
"my grandchildren say the funniest things. they love how active i am with them! all my other friends praise me for how fit i look. what diet are you on? are you even on a diet?"
"i'm renovating my house in London. you hear that? LONDON. do you know how expensive it is? oh, maybe you don't. what kind of properties do you own?"
"your earrings are lovely! i had a similar pair a couple of years ago when they were in style. i sold them off a while back at a cheap price, because that's what they are now, don't you agree? how much gold have you bought this year?"

apart from all of her showing-off and nosiness, you know what is really perturbing?
the fact that she has got her eyes on ME.
why me?
because i'm her favourite victim.
why am i her favourite victim?
(okay, i need to stop asking so many questions)

because I'M THE YOUNGEST. all my life i've been taught to treat all adults with respect, which has gotten me into loads of tricky situations recently. being a teacher's assistant, i am obligated to help my fellow faculty members in whichever way i can, ONLY if it concerns actual work related to the syllabus.

The Bully takes advantage of my position and asks me to do stuff totally unrelated to what i am employed for.


example 1:
The Bully: come here!
me: yes?
The Bully: get me a glass of water!

example 2:
The Bully: come here!
me: yes?
The Bully: carry my bag for me!

(i-wish-this-were-an) example 3:
The Bully: come here!
me: *runs away screaming*

i am not a personal assistant. my job is teaching children specific parts of their syllabus, NOT carrying other teachers' stuff around like a peon. i know, i should stand up for myself and learn to say 'no', but that 'no' could get me fired. The Bully has been around for 9 years, and since this is only my first year, i have almost no right to point out how unfair she is most of the time. plus, she's an adult. and old adult. i am nothing but a duckling in front of her dinosaur-ness, which in The Bully's eyes translates into me being too inexperienced to even open my mouth.

maybe one day, when i'm a proper lady and The Bully announces her retirement, i shall tell her how mean she has been to me, and how i have silently burdened myself with all the things she has asked me to do for her. she'll probably have this reply ready for me:

"well, at least i'm rich."


yeah and then i'll only have your support to help me get over it, haha.

x

click here to read The Staffroom Grapevine - Part 1

38 comments:

Sanam said...

Gosh, she sounds awful. Have you told any of the other members of staff that she's using you as her personal slave? & she sounds like a right old show-off, I bet it's tons of fun with her around lol(!) :)

Day By Diva
Day By Diva
Day By Diva

Sadiya Merchant said...

lol. I could say much the same things for my boss!!!!
And from my personal experience anyyyy lady teacher over the height of abt 5'8"will most definitely prove to be a horror!

Rebecca said...

She doesn't sound very nice but I've met people exactly like her before. I would love to say no too but I never would. You definitely have my support haha :)

Julie Iliana said...

aw! I wish I was around to tell her something all right... but I totally understand your position. and who knows? she probably feels so inferior that she makes up all these things, lol. plus, from your description, she reminds me of Agatha from Matilda, haha!

PS- thank you for your super sweet comment :) it meant a lot to me ♥ ♥ anyway, there's far worse things that could happen and I'm here depressed because of a celeb, lol. silly me!

Anonymous said...

Well, I feel sorry for her and her lonely existence.
If she made me fetch her some water I'd laugh in her face and bring it to her with a huge grin on my face anyway.
I'm not saying you should provoke the beast, at least not until you learn some proper Kung Fu, just in case, you know?

And I'm assuming you guys are drawn to scale? If you're anywhere around 5 feet tall, then she looks to be like 8 feet or so... and fashionably challenged.

Sara said...

you've done a great job with the illustrations. good post. i'd break down if i were you. :P

aakash said...

Oh.. I am kind of pissed off for you :|
How could she do that.. You are too nice to be treated that way..
Uske against online petition start karun main?

Arisa said...

Bahahahahahahaha
This : *Join the navy and be shipped off to Antarctica to live with penguins.* made me lmao
and i love your drawings hahaha
This woman would go down when u get older than her! .....oh wait thats not possible
I mean when she retires!!

The wizard said...

Wow, So i'm not the only one whose experienced this eh? Only I'm no teacher but I've met people like that AND also people who talk back and disrespect those kind of people so... I respect you for NOT disrespecting her :)

(am I making any sense?)

:D

Aabi said...

What a *toont*.
Cartoon Furree is sooo cute! <3
You shud totally give her the "I-pity-you-for-taking-out-your-frustrations-regarding-your-marital-life-out-on-other-people-coz-ur-just that-low" look. If there is one that is.

Fiona said...

That lady sounds like a prick. AVBLDJFDK. Is she too lazy to get a glass of water herself? Gosh.

i am nothing but a duckling in front of her dinosaur-ness,
^ LOL. [:

Guy From Karachi said...

Wow :P She seems like the most annoying person ever... Seriously. First of all, you're old, you complain, and you whine. Then on top of that, you're bossy. Hahaha, sad :P Just complain to higher authorities ! :P

Mr. Gargus said...

Aw. See, in countries like Pakistan, respect is taken sooooo seriously. In America, if done right, you could easily get away with saying (pardon my language) "FUCK OFF! I'm not your servant!" with maybe only a little bit of trouble on your part.

However, since this isn't possible for you to do, here is what I suggest:
Go onto craigslist/ebay or similar, and purchase yourself a set of Spidey Senses. Then when you sense her coming near, immediately begin doing something so as to appear to be too busy for her petty needs. (I would even imagine that even she would have the decency to not interrupt you when you are busy.)

Of course, there was a degree of sarcasm there, but you get what I'm saying, right? Just act like your busy when you are around her. See if that works.

Love You Furree!

Eeshie said...

At least I'm rich? AT LEAST I'M RICH!?! Whoa. That's a terrible thing to say to someone!

Know what I would do? I'd type up a note and leave it in her bag without signing it, and I'd inform her of allllll the evil she does.

Hmph...

Mystical said...

That sucks. I hate how adults take advantage of kids sometimes just because they're younger. If we respect them, they should respect us too.
You could always go with Eeshie's note idea. Haha. If you wrote like a stalker maybe she'd move away to London or Italy or wherever.

Unknown said...

In every working place, there will always be one or two 'strange/odd' person(s).

Lioness Without A Pride said...

Furree, she probably has a really sad life despite her richness and multiple houses and all of that. That's why she wants to be around an amazing person like you, even if it means bullying you around. Maybe she'll be impressed by your services and will leave all of her money for you in her will. You never know.

I LIKE THE STAFFROOM GRAPEVINE!!!!!!!!

Ash said...

Pimp-slap her into the concrete. Then, when a passing teacher sees her lying there unconscious and asks 'what's up?', you say 'she fell'. They'll believe you, cos she's OLD. When the dinosaur comes to and starts accusing you of assault, say she's lying, and her memeory must be slipping, cos she's OLD.

Unknown said...

The question pop up in to my brain, "a teacher being a bully? what is that all about?"
This post made laugh, only because her so called chit-chat is stupid. That bully teacher is annoying and very immature for an adult. People who talk like that are insecure. They are bragging about themselves to hide their flaws. For all we know she might not telling the truth.
Anyway, I hope you stand up for yourself. You don’t deserve to be treated that way. Just saying. :)

Kuroneko said...

I've faced one or two like that too :(

She might have problems we don't know about, but she might also just like being plain mean :X

Love the Grapevine And you totally have my support :D

Twefrence said...

woah woah woah. Is this teacher the one that gossips behind everyone's back? =O. Gosh, very horrible teacher. I would be so pissed off as well if I was treated like that, makes you feel like a slave when you're clearly not ==. The problem is because SHE is the "experienced" one in the school I bet she has some connections with the head or smt...
I guess the only thing you can do now is share your stories here =D aaaaand hope she moves onto someone else OR get shipped to antartica or smt =P.
Oh and how do you draw this nicely!! Gosh =P One of the reasons I love your posts is because it's so interesting and there's so many colours, pictures and photos =P

Anonymous said...

@.@
Someone will always do the same thing to me and my friends would call me a pushover. xD

Dun worry... They'll have their day.

CATGIRL !! said...

oh darling..i hav been the YOUNGEST TEACHER myself...n i knowww how it feels..hav taken their POKING for liek ages n then quit teaching ...n now THEY ADD ME ON FaceBook after 2 yrs..DUH!!


Hey dear! I am a female MBA from Karachi, Pakistan. Honestly just browsing through good blogs to find smart writers like you to talk to me on various issues. I write on relationships mostly as well as some funny stuff.
I hope u can be a follower if u like my blog? And don’t forget to comment please !! Click on this blog The Emotional Lava
Best of Luck for ur blogging.

Smokey_Cat said...

COME HERE AND DO STUFF!!

hahahh Loved the post, Furree!!

Maryam A. said...

LOLL. I feel sorry for you!

Voice Of Reason said...

Ekh. She sounds aweful. :/ How about you strike convo with her sometime and go all my xyz family member did this and abc family member did this blah blah, just like she does? :D And don't pause for a breath and go on and on and on until she goes away! xD
:P

Anonymous said...

Twefrence's comment made me wonder...

Have the Gossipy Aunty & The Bully ever locked horns?
Because that would be awesome!
Then again, there are other crazy people I'm sure we'll be hearing about in the near future.

Curl Jung said...

Rich aunties.. Duh.
We have them all over the place,in our families,at our work places etc etc.

Your description of her,makes me think of Aunt Josephine March,from the Novel,Little Women.

Best way to get around this people is to make them feel as if you worship them,pass a unneeded compliment ,like 'hey,you look like Elizabeth Taylor today".:D

Dani.S said...

jeezzz that woman's takin the piss! just cuz ur polite and dont wanna overstep ny boundaries..

i think she's jealous of your youthful existance ;) hehe thus the bitchiness

Rooj Siddiqui said...

Why do we have at least one annoying person like this unbearable aunty in our lives? Oh God, i swear i feel like ripping them apart when they intent to use us like their personal secretaries .. =/

I love your illustrations :D

Furree Katt said...

@---Sanam---, she IS awful! and i am scared to complain haha. but yes, sometimes it really is a lot of fun to be around her :P

@Sadiya, HAHAHAH i agree! tall ladies are usually very intimidating.

@Rebecca, yes i'm pretty sure there are loads of other women like her out there. which isn't good news :P
thank youuu! ♥

@Julie, wish you were here too! i need the support haha
and YESSSS, she does resemble Miss Trunchbull in more ways than one.
you're welcome ♥ love you!

@Martin, LOL i have no intentions of provoking her, don't worry!
teach me Kung Fu :D and i am not sure about her being lonely, according to her she has loads of friends and she always hangs out with her relatives, too.
HAHAHAHA she is tall but not 8 feet :P i am short, 5"4.
and not sure about TGA and TB locking horns. if they will, i shall definitely inform you all :D and yes, there are tons of other people who will be part of this series!

@Felicity, :D thanks! ♥ i like the name change, you were Cardinal Ruby before, were you not?

@aakash, don't be! it's okay, i can bear with it :P but thanks.
HAHAHAHA just two more weeks of work left so i'll be okay. i really appreciate the thought! :D

@Arisa, LOL, glad you liked it :D
thank you ♥ and yes HAHAHA how i wish i were older than her so that i could tell her off.
:D :D

@The wizard, THANKS FOR THE RESPECT :P i try my utmost best not to disrespect anybody, in any situation. yes, you made sense :D thanks again!

@Aabi, HAHAHAHA *toont* HAHAHAHAHA
i love youuuu. and thanks, you're cuter! and prettier. and hotter. and everything.
I SHALL TRY THAT LOOK NEXT TIME LOLOLOLOL

@Fiona, a prick is what she is, exactly. :D THANKS FOR THE SUPPORT!
and hahaha yesss i couldn't think of any other line :P


@chocolatemilk, you got that right son. :P
HIGHER AUTHORITIES RESPECT THE BULLY and a little girl like me has no voice in front of them, really.

@Mr. Gargus, HAHAHAHAHAHA, i would never do that even if i had the opportunity to. i just couldn't :P
LOL YESSSSSS, thanks for the suggestion! but you see, since i'm the assistant, i MUST obey her and be available to listen to her orders.
love you more! glad to see you back and commenting :)

@Eeshie, I KNOW RIIIGHHTT. but that is exactly what she would say.
HAHAHA that is actually a good idea. wow. thanks. I SHALL TRY THAT (if i ever work up the guts to do so)

@Beyond Timid, totally agreeing with you there.
and hahaha yeah!

@Multibrand, TRUE THAT! so very true.

@Lioness Without A Pride, yeah but STILL! why meeeeeee? out of all the sixty million super-nice-and-amazing teachers that she can bully, WHY ME?
THANKS! i shall continue with this series. ♥

@Ash, DUDE YOU MUST COME HERE AND DO THAT FOR ME. PLEASE. i want to do that. let's do it together, then :D and thanks for making me laaauuugghhh!

@mayen, glad you laughed! :D and you must be right. i don't think i had put too much thought into that aspect of the situation.
thanks! :) ♥

@Kuroneko, aww. sucks, doesn't it?
TRUEEEEE. i'm leaning towards the 'plain mean' option haha
THANKS! ♥ that means a lot to me. loveee youuu

@Twefrence, nah this is a different teacher! that one was The Gossipy Aunty and this one is The Bully.
hahah i am hoping she gets shipped off to Antarctica :P
THANK YOUUU! ♥ i try my best to keep all my posts lively and not-boring-at-all hahaha

@Hazel, i suppose we both are pushovers then. but seriously it's hard to disobey these kind of people :P
they will have their day indeed!

Furree Katt said...

@CATGIRL, YO WASSUP LADY?! glad you can relate. hahah i have none of them on facebook, which is great.
thanks for the offer! i shall check out your blog.

@Smokey_Cat, yessir! thanks :D ♥

@Maryam, dude i don't need your pity i need your SUPPORT! :P

@aashi, awful is exactly what she is. HAHAHAHA dude i would never intentionally go near her, let alone strike up a conversation. if i did, she would be TOO interested in what i had to say and then she would gossip about it/use the details against me.
so yeah, no way out. sigh!

@Hamza, OOOHHHHHHH I KNOW THAT NOVEL
and yes, they are everywhere! and HAHAHAH oh lord. that is actually a great idea. thanks :D

@Dani.S, LOLOLOLOLOLOLOL i wonder.

@Nostalgic, IKR?! we do not deserve to put up with them! ripping them apart is something we have to do soon :O
thank you! ♥

ishashime said...

oh wow. she sounds absolutely horrible. i'm sorry you have to deal with her on a regular basis.
maybe you should start telling her how awesome you are. haha. because you really are.

also. i love the drawings. her hair looks hideous! haha. xD

Furree Katt said...

@ishashime, haha she is! and i feel sorry for myself, too.
LOOOOOOOOOOL i could never do that!
thank you ♥ and yes her hair really is hideous ahahahahaa it's exactly the same as my drawing!

PurpleMist. said...

OMG, she sounds like such a cruel, heartless bitch!!
I hate people/aunties like that -.-
Btw, ur drawing are so cute and expressive :D

summer said...

I know this feeling too dear, i have had encounters with senior teaches too. Some people think because they have money, the whole world should be their servants..but hang in there girl your time will come too. cheers

Furree Katt said...

@PurpleMist, haha yeah, she is. i hate them too!
aww, thanks :D ♥

@summer, i'm glad you can relate! haha thank you :D

Moonie said...

you make me LOL super loud.