Saturday, March 12, 2011

The Staffroom Grapevine - Part 1

being the youngest member of the faculty where i work, i've been subjected to many different kinds of behavior from the other teachers, varying from being cuddled, teased, advised and loved to being downright bullied. i've been thinking that since i always post about my students, i should share some experiences on my blog that i've had with my colleagues, too.
so, i've decided to make a series, where i shall post about any funny/adorable/horrible experiences that i've had with certain teachers. since i'm really awful at timings, i won't fix a day of the week to post a part of the series. instead, i'll post whenever i feel like, and whenever i remember an experience worthy of being posted here :D
okay. i'm starting now. *drumroll*


being a teacher is loads of fun. i get to work in an amazing environment. i adore all the children i teach, and feel totally awesome that i'm contributing to their knowledge and helping them shape their future.

there's a completely different side of being a teacher where i work, though. i won't call it the dark or ugly side, because i'm not advertising fairness cream. this side is called:

The Staffroom Grapevine.

that's right. the school staffroom is one of the scariest places i have encountered in my entire life. the teachers gather there like a flock of vultures in their free time and discuss things.
what things?
by evil things, i mean 'gossip'. gossip is the one thing that can (rarely) make and (surely) break a person's reputation. usually the subject of their gossip is... *gasp* ANOTHER TEACHER.
yes, certain teachers can be cruel like that.

though not all of the teachers in the school visit the staffroom, majority of them do, which is why i've decided to collectively call whatever they do a part of The Staffroom Grapevine.

i'm going to describe one particular character without whom the staffroom would not be the same:

The Gossipy Aunty.

(the only reason that i'm calling her The Gossipy Aunty is because i can't think of any other alias for her.)

The Gossipy Aunty is one of a kind. she wears tons of makeup and prefers wearing jeans and a tee instead of standard shalwar-kameez. she's a subject teacher, which means that she isn't a teacher of a particular classroom. when she enters the staffroom, all heads turn and every teacher in her presence greets here like she's their BFF. truth is, no matter how much the other teachers feel that they're on the best of terms with her, The Gossipy Aunty is nobody's friend. the second anyone steps out of the threshold of the staffroom, The Gossipy Aunty starts gossiping about them like there's no tomorrow.
an example; 

Random Insignificant Teacher: hello!
The Gossipy Aunty: oh hi darling, how are you?
Random Insignificant Teacher: i'm f-
The Gossipy Aunty: uff! the kids from classroom so-and-so drove me crazy today. doesn't help that their class teacher doesn't know how to control them. in my opinion, she should be fired. you know she's more interested in what everyone else is wearing? truly despicable.
Random Insignificant Teacher: oh, really? i thought-
The Gossipy Aunty: no, dear. that's what it is. you don't know her like i do.
Random Insignificant Teacher: i see. well i must be off-
The Gossipy Aunty: yes of course, you have to teach those brats now! good luck, dear. off you go. talk to you later. ta!
*Random Insignificant Teacher exits*
The Gossipy Aunty: *turns to face the rest of the teachers of the staffroom* you know what i heard about the Random Insignificant Teacher a while ago? it's too much, really.

I SWEAR, this kind of stuff actually happens. The Gossipy Aunty will talk about anybody and everybody. what baffles me is that the other teachers haven't caught on the fact that if The Gossipy Aunty talks about everyone, she must be talking about them, too. the rest of the teachers are hypnotized by the tales of others' misfortunes, regaled by The Gossipy Aunty herself.

though i haven't really been in the staffroom of any other school, i'm pretty sure the amount of gossip that the school where i work in has can be found nowhere else.


there are loads of other interesting characters that i've saved up for later posts :D i would really appreciate your opinion on this series (it's the first one i've made based on my personal experiences!) and whether you would like me to continue with this or not.

love you all!