Things I've Learnt Before 20

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO ME.

I'm 20 years old, motherfuckers. (I can say that now without getting into trouble, right?)

YEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH.

(*mum sneaks up behind me with a shoe in hand to beat me up for cussing*)

I can't believe I'm not a teenager anymore. I spent seven whole years of my life getting used to teenage life problems such as wild hormones and even wilder hormones, and now I'm expected to be an ADULT?! I wish life were a restaurant with free delivery so I could call God up and say, "Hey man, can you double up on the teenage? My stomach wants its butterflies back."

This year, instead of the generic "happy birthday to me" post I do annually, I thought I would try something different. I know this concept has been rehashed a million times all over the internet, but I DON'T CARE I'VE NEVER DONE IT BEFORE SO YEAH DEAL WITH IT.

Here's my first selfie as a 20 year old.

Things I've Learnt Before 20 ~

- Everything I do will seem completely idiotic to me later on

Every year I grow up a little and begin to despise everything I did the year before. Be it crushing on someone, writing something long and winding, behaving in a certain way around somebody or wearing a certain outfit, I've learnt that any idea that seems cool to me at the moment will probably turn into the hugest cringe-worthy memory in the future. I've also learnt that this 'do-regret-do again' process will stick around till the end of time.

- Online life isn't that important

If you told me that I would be declaring the above statement on my blog three years ago, I would have punched you in your face and called you a filthy liar. Back then, I was obsessed with my online life (but you can't really blame me since I was a little home-schooled betch), and thought online relationships (a.k.a friendships) held more value than real ones. Now that I have been exposed to real-life interactions via university, I've learnt that (for me) nothing can beat laughing with someone, hugging someone and telling them they mean the world to you - in person. Even sitting in comfortable silence with somebody feels like a blessing. This doesn't mean that I love my online friends any less - I just have come to terms with the fact that seeing someone in real life has a different impact on me as opposed to communicating through a screen. Now, if given a choice between my online presence and real life, I wouldn't take forever to reach a decision that I would be completely satisfied with (but I'll probably miss getting top comments on YouTube videos...).

- Letting go is an inevitable (albeit shitty) part of life

Everyone (including myself) has changed and matured (or becomes a bigger idiot than before) over time. It's silly to assume that someone will retain the same personality forever. The sooner this fact is accepted, the better. Sometime change doesn't feel like the best thing in the world. Sometimes people you love can become toxic and overbearing and mean and nasty. And sometimes you need to let them go. I've gotten rid of so many useless people in my life that I once used to deeply care about. Even though I felt awful about it initially, with time I feel like a great burden has been lifted off my shoulders. I've learnt that holding on to everyone is just too much work and sometimes it's better to relax your grip and see who still latches on and who drifts away (ooooooooh, deep).

- Too much worrying about physical appearance is unproductive

I've learnt that if I keep nitpicking about my own appearance whenever I look in the mirror, I'm going to be an extremely unhappy person. Finding faults in the way I look does nothing except ruin my mood, so I've decided that I'm going to simply accept my tummy fat and huge forehead and short nails and oily nose for what they are. They make me who I am. Plus, ever since my new haircut, a lot of people have had mixed reactions. I tend to ignore the ones who say they 'liked my hair before' because that just puts a damper on how amazing I feel after making such a huge change. I do, however, take pains to make myself look presentable (literally - have you ever felt the throes of eyebrow plucking?) - I believe there's a massive difference between embracing your flaws and looking like a hobo.

- Not every relationship has to be serious

When I was with my ex I got so emotionally invested that I was completely devastated when things started going downhill. I was not prepared for the intensity of heartbreak at that time. I had put all my eggs in one basket, and dropped the entire thing on the ground (from a 100 storey building). Being single for over a year has definitely put things in perspective. I've learnt that youth is a glorious time that ought to be taken advantage of, and should be used to explore all options before settling on a definite one. I've learnt that peoples' company is meant to be enjoyed. I'm going to have fun and roll with things till I find something I can be happy with - and I'm going to let this process take its own sweet time.

- I'm never going to get over my laziness

I started this post with the intention of writing 20 things I've learnt but I honestly can't be bothered to write more. I've learnt that my laziness is a habit that's probably going to stick with me till the end of time. Not that I'm complaining...

x

So yeah. If you actually read through all of that, end your comment with #20YearOldSwag. (Or not...)

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO ME ONCE AGAIN! Adulthood beware, I'm here to ruin your reputation.

p.s. this is my birthday song.