mum: don't you take that tone with me, young lady! otherwise i'll get you married!
my brother: i hope you get married soon.
my brother: so that your husband can play PlayStation 3 with me since you're no good at it.me: ...
Relative's Place 1
old lady who i'm somehow related to: my dear you have grown up so much!
dad: yes, she has, hasn't she?
old lady w.i.s.r.t.: how old are you now, child?
old lady w.i.s.r.t.: *gasps* seventeen! we must get you married immediately!
Relative's Place 2
Aunt: who are you texting?
Aunt: ohhhhh, i see.
me: i'm not texting anybody.
Aunt: boyfriend, eh? *winks*
(i was not texting anyone. forgive me if checking my cellphone for the time is Heinous Crime #1)
young teacher (she's 21): i haven't seen you for so long even though we work in the same building!
me: i know, i barely get time to come down to the basement anymore.
young teacher: so, how have you been?
me: pretty much normal, you?
young teacher: i've been great. anything new?
me: not really.
young teacher: nothing? but there must be something. eh eh? *sly grin*
me: *confused* no, not really.
young teacher: nothiiiiiing? *wiggles eyebrows*
me: ... no.
young teacher: well my relationship has been going great. me and him meet every single day!
me: *realization dawns* oh.
young teacher: so, have anything to tell me?
young teacher: *eyeroll*
Random Teacher: oh wow, you look lovely today!
me: really? thank you!
Random Teacher: really. you look absolutely radiant!
me: aww, thanks.
Random Teacher: you look like you're in love!
student: Miss where is your husband?
me: i don't have a husband.
student: why? did he die?
me: no, i'm not married.
student: then how come you are a teacher, Miss?
WHAT DO THEY WANT FROM ME?!